Stop and think about it for a moment. When was the last time you put on a great pair of socks and said “Wow! That’s a great pair of socks.”? Wait, what? This has never happened to you? I’m at a loss. I can’t. I can’t go on to the next really important topic I was scheduled to write about today without providing an insight into a subject that will literally turn your life around. Improve your day-to-day for the better. End world hunger. (Deep breath here to prevent hyperventilation.) Oh, wait a minute, that’s next week’s subject. Whew! That was close.
Nonetheless, let me just explain to you the sense of great loss you should be experiencing right now. Terrible flashes of hopelessness and 20 foot waves of pain and agony crashing over your future. Standing in the middle of a densely-packed room of well-heeled haberdashers and style mavens planning their next great designs, it will suddenly rush upon you and you will be frozen with indecision. “What have I done?” you will say. “How can I halt this unforeseen reversal of fortune?”
That’s exactly when it will hit you. “Man, am I ever glad I wore my favorite pair of great socks today.” An inner calm will take over. You will wiggle your toes with great satisfaction and comfort and you will know that everything is once again right in the world. You will become unrooted from your moment of panic and great strides will be made that day. Can you not imagine a better, more fitting ending to this story? Of course not because a great suit of clothing should always begin with a finely crafted pair of hosiery created to ease the aches and pains that you haven’t an inkling you will be facing in the course of your harried schedule. Take one more detail off your plate from the very first minute you are styling every morning and slide into a sublime aura of happiness that will rattle everyone you encounter. Your pampered feet, caressed in softness and padded with layered clouds, will lift your spirit (not to mention your arches), carrying you to success upon eased success.
Mrs. Wanderer shares in this passion as well I might add. Any hour day or night that she can be found wandering our house, she is wearing a pair of fuzzy socks. Now this is its own brand of confidence as I have confronted her on more than one occasion about a pair of threadbare favorites with toes inappropriately peeking through. This is not the same discussion we are having. “Let’s get this one thing straight,” I will say.” There is a chance that the El Nina wind patterns will change today and a nor ‘easter could blow in, causing average daily temperatures to dip below 75. And you may be caught in a moment where the only pair of socks you would be able to find is the pair you are now wearing. BUT the likelihood of that occurring is slim and none and why would you risk your mother finding you cast about on the winds of desperate need in holey socks when clearly a fresh pair can be found tucked neatly in your tightly packed sock drawer?” It might even require some well-practiced tremor to reach the root cause and effect the change I was seeking. Not that her toes are a problem or anything. I like her toes. They are. Wait a minute. Wait just a cotton pickin’ minute. You are trying to distract me from the conversation at hand to sneak away and change your very own socks. Well, get to it.
One step further down the road,
Jack
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